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June 09, 2014


Hear, hear.


with regards to " instead of suspecting that everyone else in the world is having a better, more more stylish, more beautiful life" I still like this quote "We struggle with insecurity because we compare our behind-the-scenes with everyone else’s highlight reel." by Steven Furtick. Basically, remembering that many people are posting the best bits of their day.

I like connecting via the internet because, as an introvert, I find it a much easier environment to navigate. I get to know people a little by their highlights wheel. And then sometimes I get to meet them, and there is already some common ground and shared experiences. Which makes it much easier for me to connect with them face to face.

reel not wheel!

I think its a deeply human thing to feel connected, to see pattern and order in things. I am so grateful for facebook and blogs... without it I wouldn't have re-kindled many old friendships or skills that I was sad to leave behind at an earlier point in my life. As with many things I think you can enjoy the face value or find something more and sometimes both.

Just so, Jane...and well put, as usual! Jen.

Quite agree Jane. It worries me just how many young people especially only "talk" via electronic means and living with a 18 year old and 21 year old, I have to check when they say TALK whether they mean face to face or via some virtual method.

Thank you Jane, I could not have said it better. And 'comparison is the thief of joy' (Theodore Roosevelt) but it takes time to understand that. I am continually discussing these ideas with my children aged 6, 9, 13 and 16, even though they think I am very old-fashioned.

I also think it is important to see the social media platform for what it is, what to expect from it and to know what you want from it. We create the same expectations in people for constant connection online as we do with face-to-face connections - I'm not a regular contributor to Facebook or Instagram or any of the others and try not to feel as if I should. I wouldn't have done outside of these platforms anyway. I still want to choose my connections.

I'm a dissenter here in that I love twitter. It is often the way I find out about talks and events that would otherwise pass me by. And I find it a great way to quickly thank people - especially organisers of small exhibitions. For example I went to an exhibition about the Shukov tower this morning at the Gallery for Russian Arts and Design near Oxford Circus. Tweeting my enjoyment gives the gallery evidence (for funders among others) that what they are doing is valued. And just occasionally I end up having a great conversation with someone I'd never likely meet about something we've both seen (in a recent case with an Irish journalist about the play The Testament of Mary).

Another twitter fan here. Many people who don't use it don't realise you don't have to tweet anything yourself, and you can choose whose tweets you see or read. So you can choose just the really good stuff - and there are some brilliant people who tweet wonderful things, whatever your interests. I work for a charity and only tweet and read about work related things.
Anyhow, thanks for this marvellous blog- always fascinating.

Thanks for voicing your thoughts on dis/connecting. I've held out as long as I could and only recently joined Facebook, and find it and most of social media alternatively powerful, frustrating, and a time sink. It's like a modern day Tower of Babel, and its call is difficult to resist...

I still meet with a group of the first few women who commented on my blog when I began it in 2008. By meeting, talking and making around various tables throughout the country we have become friends. We get together only once or twice a year - most of us are mothers of young children so the logistics are challenging - but these electronic connections have translated into a sort of real life crafting bee. One or two of these women in particular have become close friends with whom I meet every week or two.

Twitter is frenetic and for the first six months I likened it to Norman Collier pretending that his microphone was broken - bafflingly small snippets of conversations in a sort of tickertape stream. Against all expectations I have gained confidence in my writing via Twitter and connected with such a variety of cacklingly funny, creative people that I now have to curb my use of it. It's like having the best sort of teaparty going on in your pocket all day long. It has cheered tough days.

ou're So right Jane! I am a Blogger myself and this topic has been following me since I started my Blog and is as vivid right now as it was when I began... I LOVE what happend to me and the way blogging made changes in my real life but there is still something that makes me cautious in my "virtual life". We should all remain aware of what it is after all: A virtual world, not what we REALLY live and are and most of the things we see will never really become something we can get in REAL contact with. There should be always some healthy distance between us and the things we "meet" in the www. But this is probably the most difficult thing at all; to keep the distance. For maybe not everything is connected- but we might be made for longing for we all were connected?
Anyway: I have almost all of your books here in my home in Switzerland and wanted to say a huge thank you to you for those incredibly wise and funny and inspiring words you share with us through your work! It is SO great! And I am quite happy that you still have your blog...
greetings from Switzerland

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